28 February 2011

Scorched aware - Ted Loder



O God,
I look,
and find you looking back
in the eyes of lover, child, enemy, friend, stranger,
in the image in the mirror,
i can scarcely hold watch or long bear that light in eyes
that peering of the soul
your secret hidden in us like a glowing coal-
a haunting, frightening, fascinating brand of Eden,
burning bush, empty-tomb holiness
.



I look, and am scorched aware of how fragile
and how precious is everything I love,
everything I am, have, do, give



I look, and you look back,

and in the lurch and tumble of your fire, I glimpse again

your power to work miracles

by turning the few loaves and fishes of my gifts, and me,

into food for some other lonely ones,
.
your power to ignite to flame
my look, my stretch toward you
and so to inspire to life
other wide-eyed seekers such as I.
.

In the light of such miracles, O God,
let there be community, the welding of love and courage
in me, and as far as I can see.
.
.
Grant me nerve to dare the wonder,
willingness to hold watch, to walk in the light-
that fierce, tender, terrible beauty,
of your looking, your beckoning-
that ever being burned to death, and life, by your gaze,
I may be saved, and sent again, and spent
in the sacred seek toward those I can never be with wholly,
nor yet be whole without.
.
-ted loder
wrestling the light

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